Getting Life

Below are several essays we have received from  men serving life sentences in Pennsylvania. What we have found is that some of these men “get life” in ways that are considerably different than many outsiders imagine — and are worth exploration by the rest of us.

 
 
 
 

Articles from Pennsylvania Lifers

On Family
On Fear
On Freedom
On Kids Getting Life

 
 

At times I find it extremely difficult to relate to my family and friends.  No matter how hard I try to explain my situation, I believe they fully understand.  It’s not so much my sentence, but rather the two opposing worlds we now share.  The view of what prison life consist of is way off from what it really is.  Most people believe prison is exactly what they see on television.  So to break down what prison is to the outside world is hard.  I believe you can’t know about a place until you know the people who live there.  Most of these people are of good nature, they just made poor choices somewhere along the way.  As time goes by, it’s even harder for those of us that are in prison to relate to the ones we love outside these walls.  Speaking for myself, it’s very challenging.  My family and friends are outside the state of Pennsylvania.  So visits are rare and my calls family/friends are scarce.  So most contact is done through the mail.  That’s the only way for me to really get a grasp on what’s going on out “there”.  People grow older, they die, they move; so many things happen that it’s difficult for a person to “stay in the loop”.

When I first came into the system, the support and love I received was abundant.  Over time I went from getting 5-8 pieces of mail a week to 5-8 pieces a month.  As time goes by and people get older, their responsibilities increase.  So the time they once had to sit down and write you a 3-5 page letter turned into a thinking of you card whenever they do just that; think of you.  Your true friends and overall loved ones keep the contact.  And maybe along the way you find new people who want to become somewhat of a support to you.  So in my opinion, as long as you are able to love there will always be someone willing to receive the love that you have.

Of the men here at Rockview, the ones who have the strongest family ties are the ones who aren’t assholes!  Let’s be real, would anyone want to be friends with assholes?   There are guys here who believe that their families owe them, despite the fact that they treated them like trash when they were home.  They abused their families/friends in so many ways that it’s hard to think that the pople who used to take care of these scumbags aren’t happy that they’re in prison.

For example, when I was home I was a fair guy.  I never hurt people physically, verbally, or emotionally.  I was a man of my word. (Not saying that I’m not the same person) I was a good guy.  As a result, I still have a lot of my childhood friends who’ve now become teachers, businessmen/women, doctors still standing by me.  I also have their parents in my corner along with my entire family.  Most importantly I have my high school teachers that still write me to this day.  How many people do you think can say that their 9^th grade English teacher or their 12^th grade Science teacher are still in contact with them after 10 plus years of being in prison.  To me that shows a lot about who a person is.

After being in prison for a certain amount of time, other inmates or even staff members kind of fill in for family.  Anytime a person comes to a place and is shown a side of kindness, guidance, or maybe even love that they never experienced before, I believe they kind of adopt that person as somewhat of a family member.  There are younger guys that I kind of look at as little brothers.  I want them to succeed in this life and have a lot of my characteristics that made me loved by so many.  I become that support that they don’t have on the streets.  In some cases, I believe I have stronger relationships with a lot of these younger guys than they may have with their parents.  The crazy thing is I’m only 28 years old, a few years older than they are.  But I encourage them to be great.  Something that they never had received from their parents.

In the long run, family and good friendships are a great thing to have.  That kind of support is hard to come by now a days.  Everyone seems to be so much more selfish than things used to be.  No one really wants to take the time and help a stranger as opposed to criticizing someone for a dumb decision.  I believe that we have to make sure our mistakes aren’t worthless.  There’s always an underlying message that if we choose to ignore it, we will be repeating the same errors time and time again.  It’s our relationships that we as inmates have and continue to build that will determine who we become in the future.

C.
 

Fear is something I am very familiar with. I have lived with it all my life. I have grown accustomed to it and don’t expect that I will ever live without it.

It started when I was very young and my parents began abusing me. My father started raping me when I was still very young. Any resistance was met with physical violence.

He made it very clear to me that he would kill me if I ever told anyone. I remember him saying many times that he would rather go to jail for murder than for what he did to me. I was terrified.

I remember being sent to my bedroom for the night but I knew I couldn’t go to sleep because he would be up later. It was worse if I was awakened from a sound sleep to be raped, so I stayed awake and waited in fear for what I knew was coming.

If I looked at him like I hated him it brought violent abuse upon me. I was expected to pretend that he was a good father and that there was nothing wrong with how he was treating me. I was supposed to praise him for what little he did for me.

The only way I could achieve this was by repressing the memories of abuse. I became very good at forgetting the abuse as soon as it was over, or by the next morning.

When I was about eight years old I told him that one day I would kill him if he didn’t stop abusing me. My parents’ reaction to that was to try and make me kill myself. They did everything they could to make me miserable and feel bad about myself. They told me that the things they did were OK because I was so weird.

They neglected my needs and belittled my feelings. They would not spend any money on me. My elementary school gave me a vision test and sent home a letter saying I needed glasses.

Although they had bought glasses for my brother and sister, they would not do it for me. I got my first pair of glasses when I was a senior in high school, and I bought them with my own money.

I was afraid to ask for anything I needed because I knew I would be harangued about how short of money they were and how selfish I was to ask for things. My father had a sports car and an airplane while I wore hand me down clothes and sneakers that hurt my feet.

I got one haircut per year and maybe a few articles of clothing at the beginning of the school year. I even wore hand me down socks with holes in them.

If anyone asked why my hair was so long or why I didn’t wear glasses they were told I refused o get a haircut and wouldn’t pick out a pair of glasses. I didn’t dare tell people the truth because I knew the horrors that awaited me later that night if I crossed them.
My parents were really good liars and, outwardly, very normal middle-class decent people. My mother told my teachers that I was incredibly arrogant and enlisted their help to humiliate me and teach me modesty. Her goal was to bring about my suicide, which they longed for.

My parents also told anyone who would listen that I told terrible lies. On the rare occasions when I found the courage to tell someone of the abuse, their response would always be to tell me that my parents warned them about me and that I should stop lying and obey my parents.

When I could not get help I would repress the memories so I could just go on. People were sure that the stories were lies when I didn’t remember them later.

As I got older and stronger I started fighting my dad off me. This increased their desire to bring about my suicide and they promised me that I would not live to be eighteen and move out.

My mother put rat poison in my food one time and put something else in it many times, which made me tired and weak and unable to fight my father.

I just wanted to live, and I promised them I would never tell as I bargained for my life. This was a source of amusement to them and they never agreed to let me live.

My brother and sisters largely participated in the abuse. I overheard a family meeting where it was decided that I had to die to stop me from killing my parents someday. They denied that anything was wrong to anyone who asked, and they participated in most efforts to make me feel responsible for the abuse.

There were times when I considered suicide and many more times when I was in genuine fear of being murdered. I didn’t know what to do or where to go, so I just forgot everything and managed to go on. Many times my family laughed at me for not remembering things. I didn’t know what I didn’t remember and therefore didn’t get the joke, but I was sure it was nothing serious. Today, I can’t understand how they could have been so cruel.

My teens and twenties are largely a blur because I found drugs that helped me deeply repress my memories. I always had an irrational fear of getting beat up, but I didn’t remember the vicious beatings at the hands of my father.

When I would get close to a woman who cared about me the memories would start to come back. I would withdraw into drugs pushing the woman away and the memories back into my subconscious. I hurt a lot of women who could not understand why I rejected them when everything I said indicated that I cared. Sometimes I would completely forget about a woman I was with so that I could also forget the memories that it brought back.

I was afraid of the memories and the humiliation that came with them. I was afraid of any relationship where I was expected to open up. I was afraid of love because my parents had not loved me.

In my thirties the memories started to come back to stay. I didn’t want to run and hide anymore and the memories helped to explain why I was alone and confused.

I finally wanted to remember and the horrific pictures came flooding back. I could finally deal with the shame but not with the anger. The anger consumed me and ate away at me until Memorial Day 2002 when I murdered my parents. When I was arrested I confessed and told the police why I did it. I thought the truth would come out and I could get some closure.

However, my siblings did not confirm my stories and with my taped confession giving him a strong case the DA sought the death penalty. I pled guilty and was given two sentences of Life without the possibility of parole.

I was afraid of prison but no more afraid than I have always been. You can get used living in fear. You can get used to most any situation if you have to. In prison you would be surprised at what you can get used to.

People ask me how I can live with a life sentence. I tell them that my life was never that good and it is not that bad now. As far as fear goes, I am still afraid but I deal with it and do not show it. If they know you are afraid, you are done for. If you appear confident they usually leave you alone.

I am not suicidal anymore. On good days I live for God. On bad days I live to spite all of the people who have wanted me dead. Including my own family and the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

R.

What is freedom? To some it is a better tomorrow, to others another day of life. Many believe freedom is the chance to choose on how many possessions someone has accumulated. To a lot of prisoners it is an ideal. To me, it is a way of living.

I am in prison, and you would think freedom would mean a release from confinement. Sure, that is one definition. Another might be the liberty to move as I wish. These would be nice, but I have found a more personal definition. Freedom is the way I view the world and my place in it, the way I exist with those around me. An emotional, mental, spiritual (if not physical) definition of freedom as an individual.

One of the most common topics of discussion in prison is: What will you do when you are free? Men here go on at length about what they will buy or eat, who they will meet or where they will go. There is so much energy spent on the dream of what might be once released, rather than focusing on what reality is now.

It is a form of escapism. Dreaming of a better time, place, or life somewhere in the future. All prisoners do it at one time or another. Concocting an ideal of freedom is a way of keeping hope alive, and hope is a necessary survival tool in prison.

I have discovered, for myself, freedom is not about location or possessions. It is striving every day to be a better person. It is the letters I write, and receive, the 15 minute phone call once a week, and time spent visiting with family and friends. It is in each second I spend tutoring, each breadth taken while comforting someone in need. Every nervous sweaty moment spent meeting new people at one of the seminars or sessions with students brought in to meet the Lifers. It is at the end of every day when I can look back and say, “I did something good today.” I see it on the last page of every book I read. It is infinite in the quiet moments and a comforting presence in a crowd. It is the morals I embraced and code of honor and integrity by which I have chosen to love. It is personal and it is my truth.

Being a prisoner, and lacking most of the worldly goods in life, it is easy to fall into the trap of believing freedom equals possession. It has taken many years for me to find my own definition of freedom. I, like so many other prisoners, confused freedom with living on the other side of the razor-wire. the desire for cars, games, parties, sex can seem to be what life is about. I found freedom once I changed the way I saw the world, what I really wanted in life, and my small place in the universe.

You may ask, “How can you think you have freedom?” Yes, I am in prison, and my movement is restricted to a predetermined area. Still, I have eyes that see, ears that hear, a heart that feels, and a mind that thinks. I have choices, and if I choose correctly, they allow me to be free. Using all I have and choosing to think and feel, act and interact in ways that make me a better person gives me live a better life. It is this ability to choose, think, feel, to be happy or sad, to live a life of purpose that has lead me to freedom.

I have not always been in prison. I remember spending time with my family, not living in a 8’x8’ cell. I remember car rides, birthdays, my first kiss, and school dances. I can remember, and in remembering I can feel, and in feeling I can know, and in that knowing I am free.

My love for family and friends and the things I have done to better myself are stones in a path. A path I extend everyday to walk to a future I create. A path of freedom, a path of discovery. I have the time and mind to explore each feeling to its utmost, follow each thought to its end. I may be in prison, but as long as I continue to walk this path I am free.

Freedom is not where you live, it is how you live. It is how you treat others and how this makes their lives better. It is getting up each morning and living a good life. it is loving yourself and finding happiness in the moment, in the little things you can choose. True freedom is not just of the body to move, but of the heart to feel, the mind to think, and the soul to shine.

What is freedom to you? Is it driving your car or helping a friend? Is it beer, video games, and sex, or spending time with your family? It is a loud party or a quiet moment on your porch sipping coffee and watching the sun rise? Be sure the freedom you have is the freedom you want. Because in the blink of an eye, one wrong choice, and you will have to learn to create your own freedom.

I may be confined, but I am free. I have created freedom for myself. I have transformed myself, found a path in life (even this life) that gives me freedom of the heart, mind, and soul, if not the body. I believe I am the better for it.

W.H.
24 years in

 

There are 464 juvenile lifers in Pennsylvania. Does not seem like a large number does it? There are two things you should know and consider when looking at that number. The first is, there are only three other countries in the world which have sentenced juveniles to “life without parole” (LWOP).

Israel – 7 juvenile lifers

South Africa – 4 juvenile lifers

Tanzania – 1 juvenile lifer

12 in the rest of the world!

The second thing is, with 464, Pennsylvania not only leads the world, it leads our nation in the practice of sentencing juveniles to LWOP, almost twice as much as the next highest state. So, does 464 seem like a lot now? Is this something we want to be leading the world in? Are the children of Pennsylvania more violent than anywhere else? If you believe so, what are we doing wrong in this state? We lead that world in spite of the worldwide view (at least outside of the United States and 3 other countries) that juveniles cannot be held to the same standard criminally as adults.

All of these teens received life sentences between the ages of 13 and 16. Each photo was taken shortly before the juvenile was incarcerated. (From Human Rights Watch, “The Rest of Their Lives.”)

The practice of sentencing juveniles to LWOP violates international laws, the Convention on the Rights of the Child, and multiple resolutions and guidelines for the treatment of children in the world. It is also a violation of the United Nations Minimum Rules for the Administration of Juvenile Justice. This standard says the detention of children should only occur as a last resort and for the shortest length of time possible. The United States is a member of the U.N. and signed the Convention on the Rights of the Child, but our Senate has yet to ratify it for the last two decades.

According to Dr. Ruben C. Gue, Professor of Psychology and director of the Brain Behavior Laborotory at the University of Pennsylvania,

“The critical regions that are the last to mature particularly those in the pre-frontal areas are involved in behavior facets germane to many aspects of criminal culpability…. Most studies now focus on the region that governs impulsivity, judgment, planning for the future, foresight of consequences….. The human brain doesn’t reach optimal functioning capacity, until well into their twenties.”

You may not believe that. For those of you with children or young nieces and nephews, would you hold them at 13, 14, or 15 to the same standard that you hold a neighbor or fellow employee? The courts, at least for criminal purposes, are made to hold kids to an adult standard. These same kids who are not legal to: drive, drink, smoke, vote, sign contracts, gamble, serve in the military, or work under the same conditions as an adult.

Children, who we make laws specifically to protect because we understand that they are fundamentally different, not wise or understanding enough to always protect themselves. They are not thought of as adults or expected to perform as adults until they have broken the law. We would not expect a 15 year old to be a responsible parent and make their way in the world by themselves. Yet, once they have broken the law, we are quick to try them as adults.

Juveniles who have not achieved a high school diploma or gone to college are less able to understand the legal process or legal ramifications of their actions. Juveniles have the right to participate in their own defense. Most are unable because of their little understanding of the trial process. After trial, juveniles are more likely to make critical mistakes when appealing their case as a Pro se defendant. By the time they are able to understand enough about the appellate system, mistakes are still likely due to their lack of education.

Mistakes that often deny them appeal-able issues or even the right to appeal their case altogether. This is especially true now that Pennsylvania has set a one year limit as the amount of time a defendant has to appeal a case.

If these juveniles had been given the death penalty there would be a slew of options and legal help for their defense and appeals. But, because their sentence was LWOP, often they are left to fend for themselves. You may not be against LWOP for juveniles, but should not we make sure that their legal rights are well defended? Should not we do everything to ensure the punishment they have received is a just and fair one? These are children who need protections by the court the same as any adult, if not more so because of their age.

Recently the Supreme Court rule in Roper v. Simmons that juveniles cannot receive the death penalty, and in Graham v. Florida ruled that juveniles cannot receive LWOP for non-homicide cases. Both of these decisions were due to international attitudes about how to sentence juveniles, the worldwide recognition of the differences between children and adults, international conventions and human rights documents that the United States has signed or is a part of, and the fact that even in the United States there is a growing trend to not sentence juveniles as harshly as adults and make some effort to rehabilitate them, with the idea of release some day.

Justice Anthony M. Kennedy wrote in the Roper case that teenagers are different, at least for the purposes of the ultimate punishment. They are immature and irresponsible. They are more susceptible to negatives, including peer-pressure and teenagers’ personalities are unformed. “Even a heinous crime committed by a juvenile is not evidence of irretrievably depraved character.” Thank goodness Supreme Court Justices are not elected or we might never have seen a decision like this one.

There are many cases where juveniles were influenced or coerced by an adult, peers, or someone they trusted. They were co-conspirators who were involved in the actual act of homicide. Because of their lack of life experience, capacity to understand, and inability to make complete rational decisions they became involved in a situation beyond their control. They lacked the wisdom to fully determine the extent of their action or how to remove themselves from a situation being orchestrated by an adult.

All of us were “kids” once. We have all made bad decisions because we really did not understand. Certainly, those juveniles sentenced to life made the most horrible of all decisions. But, stop and think about what we are actually saying when we agree with or advocate the sentencing of juveniles to LWOP.

The average life span for inmates is approximately 65 to 70 years. By sentencing a 13 to 17 year old to life, are we saying there is nothing they can do in the next 52 to 57 years to be given a chance to reenter society? That they can never be forgiven? That they are so evil, so horrible of a person at that age that they must spend every remaining second of their lives removed from the world? Is there no way for them to fulfill their punishment other than to die in prison?

The sentence of life without parole is itself supposed to be the punishment imposed, right? Yet, we send these children into an environment filled with criminals. An environment where often they will be victims of abuse, rape, and terror. Or, is that part a crime as a kid you just have to take your chances with homosexual rape and abuse? Do you seriously believe these types of things do not happen in prison?

We take these children and remove them from society. We separate them from their families at a stage in their lives when they need to and eventually find to replace their parents? Is the Department of Corrections supposed to assume the responsibility of mom and dad? Is the DOC to teach them right from wrong, honesty, help them develop good character, and lead them to become decent people? How can they successfully do this when there are problems enough with the adult prison population?

Do you even want these kids to develop into good and decent adults? Should we just warehouse them for the rest of their lives? Give up, forget them, write them off as a loss just because they committed this one act? Why not? It is certainly easier than thinking about or preventing the horror they will go through for years to come. It is easier to just forget them than it is to rehabilitate or help them.

Earlier I asked, “What are we saying when we sentence a juvenile to LWOP?” The better question is, what are we saying about ourselves? What about us causes us to give up on a 15 year old? To turn a blind eye to the abuse they will endure? is there something inside us so vengeful that it causes us to not care or be completely indifferent, or heaven forbid even happy or proud of what has happened and will happen to these kids?

Do we even want to try and reform them? Do we only care what will happen to them while they fill our newspapers and televisions? Once they are no longer news worthy, do they cease to exist? If we do not try to help them who will?

Say some miracle does occur, and this kid who has essentially been raised to manhood by criminals, is released, what then? There is a good chance that after 45 or 50 years a good portion of his family will have died. This person will have no close friends outside of prison. What kind of support mechanism will he have?

After spending 2/3 of his life in prison he will now be thrust into a world he is ill equipped to deal with. Having never driven a car, paid taxes, leased an apartment, paid his own way for food and clothing, and has never had a serious loving romantic relationship with a member of the opposite sex, how will he cope? These are all things you take for granted as part of everyday life.

He will have little, no, or outdated job skills that he learned in prison. He is a lifer and ineligible for many of the programs which teach modern skills. The Department of Correction’s view is lifers should be excluded from those programs because they will never be free again, even the DOC has given up hope of ever releasing any of its lifers. How will this newly released man find a job and survive?

How will this lifer, once released, meet and make friends? The people he has lived and dealt with 24 hours s day for the last 40 years, have all been thieves, rapists, and murderers. How can he learn to trust, when for the last 40 years he has learned to guard his every word and action lest he do something that is seen as weak? How can he learn to open up and show positive emotions? When love, compassion, and mercy are considered signs of weakness, things to be exploited.

Some may say even if let out, this lifer is still serving his sentence. He may never, after 40 years, fully be able to reconcile himself to a world of freedom. But of course he deserves all this, right? He broke the law. He was involved in the death of another human being, no matter his level of culpability. He may have been to young to put to death, but he is not too young to suffer rape, abuse, and the slow death of life in prison. Not too young to grow up and then grow old in prison.

We, the United States, lead the world in the sentencing of juveniles to lwop, and Pennsylvania leads this nation. We are #1! There is something for us to be proud of. We should brag about this, lord is over the other states. Maybe a parade or a banner across the capital building in Harrisburg, “The #1 state in juveniles serving life without parole, 20 years running!” There is no other country in the world, no other state in this nation that even come close to Pennsylvania’s 464. So we lock them kids up and throw away the key, after that forget them.

Sorry, that was a bit too sarcastic. Certainly, this the great state of Pennsylvania can figure out a better way. A way that involves punishment, rehabilitation, education, and mercy. I refuse to believe that children in Pennsylvania are more violent than anywhere else in the world. I have not forgotten that they have destroyed a life. But, let us not allow them or ourselves to destroy a life. We are better people than that. Try mercy instead of revenge, compassion instead of indifference.

For those of you who have not been swayed by my argument so far, let me try a different approach. I have appealed to your heart and mind, how about an appeal to your pocket? Let’s talk money. As a taxpayer the fate of these juvenile lifers affects you whether you are for or against LWOP for kids.

It cost approximately $33,000 per year to feed house, cloth, and otherwise take care of an inmate who is under 50 years old. Upon reaching 50 the price goes up to $65,000 a year. The DOC’s yearly budget is around $1.8 billion and growing. All paid for by you the taxpayer.

There are 464 lifers in Pennsylvania who were under the age of 18 when their crime occurred. I am going to use some rough numbers here so bear with me. First, let’s round 464 to 450. Next, separate it into 3 equal groups, group A, B, and C. Then, estimate the average current age of group A as 20, group B as 30, and group C as 40. Let us then assume that none of these lifers will be released and that all of them will die in prison but, not until they reach 65 years old. Let’s see what the taxpayers of this state will be asked to pay over the life span of these letters.

Cost of group A over their lifetime: $294,750,000

30 years at $33,000 and 15 years at $65,000 X 150

Cost of group B over their lifetime: $245,250,000

20 years at $33,000 and 15 years at $65,000 X 150

Cost of group C over their lifetime: $195,750,000

10 years at $33,000 and 15 years at $65,000 X 150

Cost of all groups combined $735,750,000

Again 464 may not have seemed like a large number, but $735,750,000 has to grab your attention. That is not all! Every year there will be more juveniles sentenced to LWOP. Kids who will cost the taxpayers more money and who advocates say should not be given a chance at release until they cost $65,000 a year. How many juveniles will be sentenced to life on average in a year? I do not know, I am fairly certain at the rate PA is going you could bet on at least 10 a year. Figure out how much they will cost you over their lifetime if the average age of each is 16 when arrested.

My figures may not be 100% accurate. I am using some speculation as to ages. You will have to do your own research. I am sure some of you will come up with figures that are less and more than what I have here. But, $735,750,000 is in the ballpark. More than likely the cost by the time each one of these 464 people die in prison will be over a billion dollars. All paid for by you, your children, and your grandchildren.

Do not worry. With a budget of $1.8 billion a year and growing, the DOC has enough of your money to cover the cost. Do not worry because it does not seem as if our legislators are. Just work hard and pay your taxes. The DOC is more than willing to hold these kids in prison until they die. Just like you want them to, as long as you are willing to pay for it.

I am not asking any of you to take what I have written at face value. Please do your own research. I have used my 22 years worth of prison experience, as well as:

Senate Resolution 149

“The Rest of Their Lives, Life Without Parole for Child Offenders in the United States” by Amnesty International and Human Rights Watch

These are sources two of information but I am sure you can find more.

Please think about all this. Ask yourself, “Is there not at least one of these 464 lifers who deserve a chance?” Maybe one who was a co-conspirator, or 2nd degree, someone who was not the “trigger man”, who we could release before they are 50 years old?

Our system is one of punishment and rehabilitation. If we never give these men a chance how can we say we are rehabilitating them? We always hear about the failures, the “Reggie McFaddens”. We never hear about the successes. What about those who were given their chance and went on to live productive, crime free, successful lives? Apparently in the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s their were quite a few lifers who were able to overcome their past and prove themselves. Is not there at least one more?

Should not we take a serious look at this issue? Before some of these lifers have spent 2/3 of their life in prison? That to release them might be less merciful than leaving them in the only home they have known for all of their adult lives. I have heard it is said, “A society is judged by how it treats the least of its citizens.” Certainly these kids who were sentenced to spend the rest of their lives in prison are some of the “least of our citizens”. How in the coming years will we treat them? How will we be judged because of that treatment?

If you cannot find it in yourself to consider mercy, then, and I know this is shallow, can you consider saving yourself some money. Again, look all this up for yourselves. In this age of information and technology it behooves us to make decisions on crime and punishment of children filled with knowledge and not out of feelings of fear, revenge, or indifference and certainly not just because those we elect tell us this is the way it should be.

There are plenty of organizations both for and against lifers and inmates in general. I will not name them here. They may not wish to be associated with this letter. They will be willing to answer any questions you have. I am hopefully this letter will invoke an outcry against life for juveniles, but I know for some it will only re-enforce their belief that all those in prison deserve what they get. My goal in writing this was not to really change any one’s mind, though I am optimistic. You have to change your own mind. I only wish to spark public debate. Which I believe, in the great tradition of this country, is how great change happens.

Read. Research. Debate. Decide for Yourself!

M.